Therapeutic approach
In the same way that it makes no sense to make personal assessments of someone, who, for example, has a cold (it is obvious that no one is better or worse for sneezing), the same happens with pathologies in the psychological field. Avoiding blaming ourselves in a systematic way allows us to take responsibility for our actions.
The difficulty in mental health lies in the fact that when the person identifies with their pathology, it “is” their pathology. There is an inflation of the ego when it defines itself through suffering. It’s as if the person said: “That I might not be safer if I protect myself with an armored tank, than simply fighting with my hands?” Undoubtedly, but to live inside an armored tank is not to live, but to survive, to be above life, which is feared because it entails death. In reality, it is fear of life.
People with mental disorders experience themselves as leaves blown by the wind, because the more they insist on controlling (doing what they should do, being wanted as they should be wanted, etc.), the more uprooted they feel.
"Life is going to be vulnerable!"
Even if the subject is expressed through the ego, the subject is not the ego, but the truth beyond what the ego wants and protects with its tank.
Therapy happens so that the person can collide with the walls of this armored car, to realize (re-know, re-flex, re-integrate) that he is here. This prison can be adorned with illusions and good intentions, in a warm atmosphere full of complacency and family portraits. But it is still a prison, whose objective is that one does not have access to herself, to her pain, to her reasoning, to her decisions, to her life as a given.
"The truly therapeutic, is to live"
That is why an appropriate psychological therapy does not involve doing “things” to the person or that the person has to do “things”. Limiting ourselves to regulating what the person does, says or feels, still keeps us on the plane of the ego identified with their pathology, which we reinforce by giving it a leading role.
If I fail in a goal I set, am I a failure? If I then set myself an even bigger goal, am I a better person? No. This world has already ended. And if it wasn’t that, we start to see what’s behind it: The wound of the ego for not being so important. The wound because there are things more important than one: The truth. I can’t solve something by judging what should or shouldn’t have happened, I can only deal with it as it has happened and that’s the way it is. But then the battles of the ego, of triumphs and failures, are the same, it doesn’t matter whether it hurts me or pleases me. Being able to afford this is mental health.
I know what it’s like to fight against a psychological pathology. I remember the only thing I was asking for was to have a viable chance, because the plan was always about “saviors”, heroic deeds, or becoming who I wasn’t. But to have a viable chance, I also had to be viable, and this giving up (psychologically) the tank, to stand on my own two feet, was unthinkable, and, therefore, I returned to the “saviors”, to the heroic deeds and to become who I was not. A fish that bites its tail. What turned out to be disruptive of this spiral, was to start a serious and appropriate therapy, and this is the vocation that has led me to offer you this service.